In the Life of a Fickle Intern

May 23, 2012

Oh, Baltimore.

Filed under: Personal Ramble — dailymedicine @ 21:06

Baltimore has not been kind to me this year. Even before I made the official move, I was naive enough to fall for a scam losing a good chunk of change by putting down a deposit on a place I hadn’t seen. That was completely my fault for being so incredibly trusting and inexperienced. When I moved here, my apartment has found ways to give me additional stress, as if being an intern was not enough.

On arrival to Baltimore, I found an empty box that once held books that I had sent myself from Memphis sitting outside my door. Twenty-two years of yearbooks completely gone. I had to let it all go, but I definitely spent hours on the phone with the postal service trying to locate my memories. Things were ok until the weather became colder. All winter long, my heating system kept on breaking down so the temperature in my apartment stayed at a nice, cool 60-65 degrees fahrenheit for months and months. If it were not for space heaters and down blankets and lots of sweatshirts, I think I might have frozen to death. However, because of my space heaters using whatever voltage they used, the electricity fuse kept on blowing out. I either woke up or came home to a dark, electricity-less apartment at least a dozen times. It was frustrating, but whatever, it was temporary. Minor details, right?

The first time I was broken into and had my laptop stolen, I shrugged it off. It’s Baltimore. Everyone will eventually lose something. I wasn’t hurt. It was over. I was gone for an extended period of time. I made arrangements to move at the end of my lease. I even got renter’s insurance. I thought it was done and over with. However, very unfortunately, and more frustrating than anything else, I got broken into a second time this last weekend. This time, both my replacement laptop and my iPad were taken. Even my cell phone charger was taken! Unlike the first time, my composure was nowhere to be found. I might or might not have gone in a minor hysterical emotional crisis. I had stepped out for an exactly an hour to get coffee down the street. An hour! How scary is that?! The police responded right away and the maintenance people responded as soon as I called, but it still felt too late. I felt so violated and vulnerable. I pretty much cried all day. Worst of all, I had to work nights all weekend. I came into work with red, puffy eyes and as soon as anyone would ask me what was wrong, I went into a another crying spell. Though it may seem counterintuitive, I was really glad to be at work that night, surrounded by people I knew. The crying eventually stopped.

Despite it all, I am determined not to let Baltimore and all the mess that it has to offer get me down. Through all of these experiences, I am reminded again and again of what an amazing support network I have, both locally and from afar. After this second break in, within a few hours, I had a place to crash for the weekend and more impressively, a temporary apartment to stay in until my lease was up. My family called endlessly offering everything from emotional support to financial support. I didn’t take them up on that second offer but I did find a random deposit in my bank account yesterday. Everyone in my program who knew of the incident offered up their homes to me, whether it was on their couch or in their spare bedroom. I even got offered a few days off to get things together by my boss. I didn’t take the offer, but I was grateful to have had that option.

Now that everything is slowly returning to normal, I feel a little less vulnerable. I am grateful that I wasn’t there when the robber broke in. Though the whole thing might have not happened if I never left. Who knows?  Nonetheless, life moves on, and more importantly, everything will be ok. Right…?

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